Steep Curve

It's been some time since i blog as im just started on my new job. A very different job scope from what i have learned and worked so far. Just started to settle down as im taking over someone, the transition period were also quite different from what i experienced previously.

I have to concede that the learning curve is much steeper than i thought.

Hope i could settle down sooner and get thing going.

Rascal Flatts - Unstoppable

Yeah yeah yeah..
Hey

So, so you made a lot of mistakes
Walked down the road a little sideways
Cracked a brick when you hit the wall
Yeah, you've had a pocket full of regrets
Pull you down faster than a sunset
Hey, it happens to us all

When the cold hard rain just won't quit
And you can't see your way out of it

CHORUS
You find your faith has been lost and shaken
You take back what's been taken
Get on your knees and dig down deep
You can do what you think is impossible
Keep on believing, don't give in
It'll come and make you whole again
It always will, it always does
Love is unstoppable

Love, it can weather any storm
Bring you back to being born again
oh, it's a helping hand when you need it most
A lighthouse shinning on the coast
That never goes dim

When your heart is full of doubt
And you think that there's no way out

CHORUS

Like a river keeps on rolling
Like the north wind blowing
Don't it feel good knowing
Yeah

CHORUS

Love is unstoppable
So you made a lot of mistakes
Walked down the road a little sideways
Love, love is unstoppable

1st Apr

Initially i wanted to give myself a deadline till the end of the month that if i dont get a job by that time, i have every intention of going into freelance events, which was an interest that i pick up lately.

But somehow, an offer for a job came 18 hours later.

Though i maybe back to where im best at, it will be a total different level playing field.

The job interview itself was a killer, took nearly 1 hour to complete. The only thing i knew was that my job agency personnel got a shock on what the company had offered me. Well, i gestured to her that the interview was worthwhile afterall.

The title may sound nice, but in actual fact, it will be cover mountain cover sea.

Going to enjoy my last 3 days of holidays!!

Dog mate till vomit

Well, the dog vomitted at the wrong end.

OCBC Cycle Singapore 2010

This is by far the most siong and taxing assignment i have ever done. The timing is super duper long but compared to Stan Chart Marathon, the duties were quite easy actually.

I was in charge of the volunteers and to rotate their duties at various places which includes the carnival, lifestyle village and the riders' cafe. And this is also the first time that majority of my group were girls. Wah lan eh! Trying to look for guys to carry stuff is just so difficult.

But overall i had fun and knowing new friends who share the same interest in volunteering.

Job-seeker

It's going to be 1 month since my attachment ends but till now, there is no job offer even though i have send resumes to job agencies, looking through classifieds ads in the papers and going for job interviews.

Funny thing is that i do have some job offers in sales and front-liners but i know myself well enough which area im more comfortable with.

When i first looked out for jobs, my initial concern was the coming OCBC Cycle Singapore 2010 which i volunteer to help out. I mean, i still apply for the job opening or to go for job interviews, hoping that i could start work after the event. But it look like my concern are unfounded.

Hopefully by next week, i will be able to hear some positive news. I have rested enough to start the new phrase of life.

Personality test

Another personal test that i have done on Facebook, in a way i find it quite true and get to know more about myself. Some things that i dont even know, perhaps in a conscious way, especially those points in what im most afraid of.

Below are your Personality Tests result:
Who is your true self: You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Your view on yourself:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are down-to-earth
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : People like you because you are so straightforward
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are a true romantic
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : When you are in love
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You will do anything
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Everything to keep your love true

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person

The seriousness of your love:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are very serious about relationships
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : If you meet the right person
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You will fall deeply
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Beautifully in love

Your views on education:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Education is very important in life
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You want to study hard
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Learn as much as you can

The right job for you:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You need to choose something
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Go for it to be happy
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Achieve success

How do you view success:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are afraid of failure
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous

What are you most afraid of:
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : You are concerned about your image
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : The way others see you
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : It's time for you to believe in who you are
Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ : Not what you wear

Strange encounter

Yesterday attended the Chingay Parade rehearseal 2010 and i have a rather strange encounter with a girl at a taxi-stand on the way back home.

I was not eavesdropping as i was smsing my friends when somehow or rather, i heard the girl hinting something to her mum.

Girl: Mum, he is as tall as you lor.

I look left, right and behind me. Behind me was an auntie. And im the only guy in the taxi stand!!

Me: Are you referring to me?

The girl was shocked when i ask her that.

Girl: Mum, you see, he is talking to me.

I and her mum look at each other, and smile. The girl dont dare to say anything after that.

Next update

January have just whizzed past, without blinking of an eye. Nothing meaningful done for the last month as im more engrossed in my work than anything else.

2 more weeks to go and im done with my attachment. Having say that, the thought of having a break is perhaps the only door present to me at the moment as no doors on full time jobs at the moment. It also give me the answer where i stand in my current working place.

From now till the eve of Chinese New Year, i dont think i have the time to update my blog due to my work. The work itself is enough to snap my energy away for any activities in the evening.

Till then, wishing all Chinese and everyone a Happy Chinese New Year with a roar literally.

Trust

Is there anyone i could really trust to such an extent that i have no worries of breaching it? Currently i couldnt find that person who fits in this category. Those people whom i really close to, i could only reveal that much to them, and not all as what i expected or intended to.

I have talked to those people that im close to, and told me to interact, open up, coming back to Plurk!

But then again, i began to wonder whether human beings are really that forgiving in the first place.

Either that, or the best case scenerio will be moving on and left the past behind me. I believe that the past have made it a lose-lose situation for all parties. Hence the reason of moving on rather than staying put and caused unhappiness.

Can someone teach me how to trust people once again?

One step at a time

4 more weeks to go and my attachment officially ends. To be precise, there is only 20 days to go.

Anyway, the new year have started on a bright note for me and in the midst of accomplishing some goals which i have left untouched last year.

I have been trying to keep myself busy this month by going for some seminar talks and career talks, in a way trying to create more doors for my future path. But ultimately, it still lies with God who is in control of everything.

I am giving myself till the end of this month to see if there is any offers. If not, i might want to take a short break. It's been a long time since i take a break. Even taking a break this time round might not be a good thing given that the economy is picking up and companies are hiring people now.

Oh well, one step at a time.

2010

First post for the year and immediate thoughts will be some unfinished business that left lying around for the last few years.

6 more weeks to go before my attachment ends but i have actively looking for jobs through friends and agencies. Im not closing the door for my current attachment if there is an opportunity for me.

At the meantime, savour the usher-in of the new year and wishing everyone a blessed and happy new year. God bless!!

Overview of the story

This will be my last post for the year. I know that by saying out this story will not only open several cans of worms, and to suffer repercussions. But what had been done, is done. I will be taking full responsibility of what is been told here.

I am writing this to everyone that got to know my difficulties and problems earlier this year. I am grateful for the moral support and everything that God have given to sustain me. But I find that it's come to a point where I feel like giving up everything.

I believe that in this post, are those curious readers, strangers, etc that happen to read my family's problems since day 1. Family buy shop from bank, business not picking up, shop sold at a loss and had to call relatives for help to fund the losses. And family got into debt that never clear till now.

After that, I came into the picture, with the intention to help. But who knows that I caused even more trouble to my family. It's was a lesson that forever etched in my mind. Recently, my mind began to think of the incidents that I have done in the past and was overwhelmed with guilt.

The reason why i mentioned i feel like giving up everything was because of my inability to help my family over the last 3 years, where i made a decision to study full time rather than working to support the family, or even signing on for the police. At times i really wondered whether i did make the right choice. I know that i still have 2 months to go for my attachment before getting a full time job. Even getting a full time job at my current attachment could be difficult due to job fit, where im not suitable for customer service or front line. In the end, i have to do admin job, sort of like back-end operations. I am not complaining as I gained invaluable experience especially in listening and soft skills such as saying please and thank you.

At times i wanted to have a heart to heart talk with someone that i can confided in, but no one is willing to lent a listening ear. I really dont know how long i could bear with it, especially where next year i have no choice but to take up the responsibility to help my family return the debt through my hard-earned pay. Sometimes i feel that i have enough and wanted an instant resolution to it. But again, i know that that is not the way. I am not even sure of myself either, where previously i have the confidence to do it.

I hope to find my old self again.

Help in vain

On 23 Nov 2009, Parliament in Singapore amended a Bill to have stiff penalties directed at those loansharks, especially those at the top-ranking in the hierachy. In the first place, the government anticipated this problem to occur when the world was facing financial crisis in Sep 2008.

Knowing that there will be a rise in this particular crime, shouldnt the government have done something more to prevent it?

Granted that jobs will lost in the recession, overhead costs will be down and spending power will be less, yet there is a minority of people whose income level is less than 30k per annum, is rejected by the banks or financial institution when they need genuine help? Where do they go to? Plead with their ministers when they went for 'Meet-the-People' session? Seeking financial assistance from other support groups? Or finding loansharks to seek their help?

So now, the Bill had been amended but social problems will still be around. With the Intergrated Resorts in operation next year, it will be a losing fight if the government still not going to do something to help those needy people. Banks or financial institution only granted or approved loans to those whose income level is more than 30k. Yes, considering part of the social problems have to do with gambling, but what about those who really need help in their utilities bills, groceries, transport, etc? Will the support groups able to help those given the red tape?

Sever ties

19 days to go before a brand new year starts.

As usual, not going to make any resolutions as it doesnt work on me.

With exactly 2 months to go for my attachment to end, I cant wait to secure a full time job. I had enough of the past problems that besieged me these 3 years. Every year without fail, I would wondered whether the path that I took is really worth it.

Anyway, there are certain ties that i just have to sever and to cut it off. No point keeping it where resentment and anger is in place.

All the best and a Happy New Year!!

Job fit

Somehow or rather, my worst fears came true. Way before this attachment starts, i already got information that i will be working in this industry. I know myself best in terms of strength and weakness. I was given a choice in working in another industry but given that i already make that choice in the first place, i might as well stick to my choice and see how it goes. It was something that i wont regret no matter what the end results will be, as been in a job scope that im rather weak in. I would take it as an experience gained rather than an opportunity lost.

How wrong i am!

The environment itself is like a war zone. The expectations from both sides (customers and management) is beyond what i could have imagined. What you say to customers must not be offending to them to such a point that a PR script is readied in case you unable to answer the queries.

After 2 months of guarding the gate no matter how hard i try, management isnt pleased with the performances and pull me out. They have put me in another dept where i could brush up my soft skills.

Oh well, the remaining 2 months attachment is the last chance for me, if not i would have to redo the 6 months attachment again.

Lowest ebb

Today is a day where all kinds of feelings come into play. And for the first time that i could remembered, today is the day that i feel the lowest. Compared to the past incidents where i have no control for what i have done, today is also the day where i did nothing yet still in low spirits.

I dont know whether is it because of work or because of my own actions in the past incidents where consequences have started to haunt me. But i only know that i have admit to what i have done and take full responsibilities of it. If the feeling is due to both work and past incidents, i have to run the full course.

There is no way to run away or escape from it. Sometimes i wish i could have a heart to heart talk with someone that im close to or to go to the beach where im comfortable with, sit down and stare blankly into the sky.

My mind right now is very tired from the undue stress.

For a change

A blink of an eye and 2009 is coming to a close. This is a year which i would rather not remembered. This is the year where anything that could happen, have happen.

All my goals and ambitions that i wished to achieve or complete for this year is put on hold till next year. Not that i wanted to procrastinate but rather the wrong steps that i took.

Every year is the same old thing where you wish to have a good and prosperous year, yet get to see and do the wrong things all over again. The only wish i have right now is not to have history repeat all over again.

Wishlist for 2010:
1. Get a job that i really like and love doing rather than for the sake of money
2. Complete my unfinished targeted goals
3. Live a contented life, work hard to achieve the dream as there is no short-cut to success
4. Work in overseas
5. Get a girlfriend (im laughing out loud myself over this wish.. hahahahha)

Speaking of which, the last wish is something that i intend to salvage. The time and committment is still not there where i admit other priorities came first such as my family and my work.

Pursuing dreams

1 month plus into the attachment, I have know the answer whether the job is suitable for me.

Im more or less know the path that is been lay out in front of me.

I would rather pursue something that achieve my goal, my ambition and my dream, rather than pursuing for money.

Money cant buy everything, especially happiness and satisfaction.

Im not saying that im dissatified, but rather this job is not meant for me.

I miss being a little boy

LOL!! I just couldnt resist posting it. Every men will definitely want to be in those little boys' position and take advantage. Though chances of shouting rape or molest is very slim, I doubt Singapore women will allow little boys to do such a thing. The most they will teach the little boy a lesson. I wonder what else Singapore women will do if they are in the situation?