Last entry

today will be the last day i blog the things between the two of us.. if not the whole blog site will just be the two of us.. nothing but the two of us..

firstly, i realised something when i was on tour of duty last night.. i remember that whenever there is cracks in the relationship, people tend to be in denial, agitated when asked or give false assurance..i donno how many people have told you about it in the first place..but it seem that i was the unlucky person whose asshole looks bigger now for nothing.. look, you know fully yourself about this relationship right from the start.. yet you have been extending deadline time and time again..this awkward feeling you and i have it..for me, i feel it's already unbearable.. i know you are trying to be tolerance towards him..and to me too.. despite what i blog between the two of us, you either seem to be tolerating or doesnt seem to give a care.. i know that i cant order you who to love.. i have been very "quiet" since the misunderstanding..but i know that you have been reading my blog.. i feel that my actions is still not strong enough to send the msg across through this medium..

secondly, despite what you have done in the friendster as in creating a profile for your bf, whether there is a testimonial or not, i already know that you are behind it..

thirdly, may i know what are you treating me for? a rugged doll waiting to be throw anywhere, at your disposal? when i want to give up, you didnt say anything.. now when i dont want to give up, you ask me to..

lastly, dont compare him to me or to any guys out there, be it past or present or future.. all is unique and different in character..

if you could accept him as a bf in the first place, why cant you accept me on the other hand? are you expecting me to change just for your sake.. if i accept you for who you are and what you are, and didnt ask you to change according to my liking..what right do you have to change me?

im just like a dog been locked up in a kennel, waiting for the owner to come and leash me up, ready to meet the challenges ahead outside of this world....

anyway, this will be the last entry between the two of us..i will be MIA now..for the time being.. but my heart still longs for you.. i will still blog occasionially...